Long overdue check in

So life chez-Lina is pretty good.  Still crazy, still heart wrenching, and certainly full of social workers but good.

Spunk (now 5) has sort of figured out that we're sticking around.  She's full of statements like "You are MY mom" or "You will be MY mom forever".  Toileting has improved tremendously, she's finally going to school all day and generally thriving.  She's able to read a bit, print well, and academically closer to her peers that I'd expected given all this emotional upheaval.  Her struggles (school wise) are more learning social skills.  She's so fearful of rejection, she has a hard time asking others to play or letting them control the game.

Clover (now 13) has had a rougher time I'd say.  In my last post, I mentioned she slipped and called Mr. Lina Dad.  That was the start of her brain going "Holy fuck what is going on???  We don't trust MEN!!!".  I spent the fall saying she was sliding, she needed help, she hit a bottom in December which opened us up to more help.  We've added more medical professionals to the team, sorted out an alphabet of diagnosis and we're working on treatments.  Somehow through bleak months where she couldn't do more than mumble to Mr. Lina she still managed to have 5 grades at 90%.  She has a boyfriend so I now get to talk about sex and worry about what's happening on that 45 minute walk after school on top of the usual mental health/parenting concerns.

Legally speaking, the girls are still our foster daughters.  There was a lab in Toronto that did hair analysis to find historical drug use.  There was a false positive in a divorce case (so impacted custody but nothing to do with adoption) which led to an inquest.  Because of the inquest, they are now opening up every single case where the lab was used to see if it played a factor in the apprehension of children.  Until that is resolved, all adoptions for cases where the lab was used (even distantly - like in the case of an older sibling who is now an adult holding back the younger sibling from being adopted) are on hold.  I cannot control the government, I know our case and I know I have nothing to worry about.  Birth mom is actually in a good spot now and she recognizes the girls are better with us.  But it does mean I have to adhere to more social worker visits and paper work for much longer than expected and I still can't post pictures.

My parental leave came to an end March 29th.  We spent the whole month getting the girls ready for Dad taking over (Mr Lina has been on parental leave since November).  2 days one week, 3 the next and all 5 days after March Break, Mr. Lina did the whole morning alone and I usually tried to find somewhere to be after school.  With social worker visits and therapy being as frequent as they are, the after school part didn't always work out, but it showed them he could do it.  The night before I went back to work, Spunk climbed up in my lap asking for "help" to finish the last few bites of food.  We used to do this all the time and she hadn't asked for weeks.  Mr. Lina asked what that was about and she said "Tomorrow is going to be a very tough day and I need extra cuddles from Mom."  Kudos to her for being able to articulate her feelings. 

My return to work lasted 2 hours.  I was given a severance package.  While I was off they sold the software I specialize in and my position was not there to return to.  Never mind the fact there are presently 5 openings I could fill in other divisions.  Not my problem, we're leaving that to lawyers.  For now, I will casually look for work and enjoy more time at home.

This past weekend, Clover's best friend had her birthday party.  Her dad travels for work a LOT so they have points up the wazoo so they book 2 hotel rooms in Toronto, let her bring 4 friends and essentially hang out in a hotel room for the sleep over.  Her mom asked me along.  I'm game for bonding with another mom who has known my daughter longer than I have and seeing Clover interact with old friends I don 't know myself.  I had to drive myself, there were 7 in total and their car holds 6.  I didn't mind the drive and paying for my own parking but I was wanting to go home with Clover, have a little time 1:1.  She wanted to go with her friends.

Rejection is the hardest part of living with Clover.  She does it over and over again.  In little things, like not eating brownies I made, not eating vegetarian food I made for her (she's the least healthy vegetarian I have EVER met, breadetarian would be more accurate).  She pisses Mr. Lina off by putting her feet on the kitchen table and leaving lights on.  The bigger deal you make of it, the more it happens. 

So I said I was disappointed but let her go in the other car.  I couldn't manage my own anger to turn it into a fun afternoon with her at that point.  It's not fun if she doesn't want to be there.

I went to Queen and Spadina and thought of past times shopping there.  I only bought one piece of linen (I have insane stash to work through still and Sunday is not a good shopping day), but I remembered the fun blogger shopping trips.  It was inspiring and calming and made me feel good.  I went to a European grocery store that is no longer convenient and stocked up on mulled wine tea and garlic sausage for Mr. Lina.  I went to Starbucks just so I'd have a cup to put in the recycling bin. 

Me petty?  Never. 

Not petty when I told her about staying in Toronto for a few more hours, how I forgot what kind of a great vibe there is around Queen West and times I spent there with Mr. Lina...

I also finished up a t shirt I cut out a week ago.  Just a clone of a retail shirt I have that I like, nothing crazy, pretty much a big rectangle  rayon knit that drapes nicely and is long enough for jeggings.  And don't you know I put it on this morning and slop egg yolk down the front of it.  I didn't even wear it for an hour before needing to wash it.  On the plus side, it is wearable, the yolk came out and I have cut out another shirt from navy modal I bought in 2012.

Procrastination

As mentioned, we had the basement and hallways painted.  This required furniture to be moved and while some stuff went to the garage, the rest was moved around the room or into other rooms.  I figured while the furniture was away from the walls, it was a good time to borrow my parents steam cleaner and get to the carpets that haven't been seen in 9 years.  Until last night, there wasn't even a spot in the house where 3 people could sit together that wasn't a bed.

This is a long winded way to say I (we) have a lot of things to move and decide to pack or not pack and I don't really want to do it.

So what is a procrastinator to do? 

ANYTHING else.

And how have I filled my time?

1. Sorbetto #3 (I think it needs back darts, it's a bit puffy and I need pictures to blog)
2. Sorbetto #4 (I do have pictures but not with me at the moment)
3. Toronto Sewing Meet Up on Saturday (and I need pictures to do this justice, short version was that it was a whole lot of fun, so great to meet other bloggers and readers!)
4. Complete addiction to the game Dominion (seriously awesome card/deck building game, Mr. Lina should not have told me about the on line version)
5. Sewed up the fabric I bought at King Fabrics into an A line skirt
6. Wore said skirt to work and lawn bowling (a team event which necessitated light coloured clothing and I have come to realise I don't wear a lot of white)
7. Walks with Mr. Lina
8. Massive amounts of dusting as furniture was moved
9. Sneezed.  I know this is odd to include in a list of things I've done, but I'm sneezing a lot, clearly ragweed season is starting.

I think to get anything done I have to think of something else that I want to do even less. 

I am seriously happy with my white skirt.  Believe you me, I'll be posting about it because there are things that I like about it that make Mr. Lina's eyes glaze over.  I am very pleased by the construction and I find myself thinking about another one and the changes I'd make and what fabric I have in my stash that would work better.  I've already trimmed down the pattern pieces where I think it needed tweaking.  It's just calling my name to try that tweak out.

This is more of a note to myself but... I seem to have a new sleep issue.  Not only am I now an occasional sleep walker and talker (which I haven't done in a while now), but we can add humming to the list.  Twice this week I've woken up Mr. Lina.  Although he tells me the second time it was a ghost humming the tuneless song of its people from my side of the bed.  I appreciate he tried to make it funny.  Googling tells me it's not an issue to my health, but I don't like that it's waking Mr. Lina up.

You know what I'm not?  Sad.  At all. 

Friday night we went to see some very good friends.  On the drive there (about 45 min) I was telling Mr. Lina about some fanstasic Excel-fu I unleashed at work that day.  He doesn't use Excel so most of this was going way over his head and I knew it, but I had to share my pride in making it work.    And then he said it was good to see "Chatty Sera" back again.  I'm a talkative person, to the point when I'm quiet, he worries and is quick to assume I'm angry.  I've been quiet a lot the past few years.  From my perspective, I simply did not have much to say, certainly nothing that was exciting to bubble out of me.  He sees the change.

On Friday morning we met with our fertility doctor for our review of the last FET.  I figured it would at the very least give us closure with the clinic.  I have mentioned that our doctor takes my losses personally, like he should be able to "fix" this problem and I keep stumping him.  He even offered us an IVF cycle for free if I don't make it to 12 weeks of pregnancy.  And we politely declined.  It's not money making me stop, I don't want to do that again.  I appreciate the offer, but it didn't even feel tempting.  I think that's a good sign that I really am honestly good with this.  I'm on the right path and I know it.

Quite likely, there are children out there right now that are going to call me mom.  This has all been part of the journey that is going to make us the right parents for them.

The Parking Lot

The other day I was meeting with someone at work and she talked about "The Parking Lot".  She was giving advice to my new coworker that he didn't need to know everything right off the bat.  It was always okay to say "I don't know, let's put that in The Parking Lot and I'll find out for you".  It's good advice, he's not going to catch up to my 7 years of doing this in 3 weeks.

For me, this blog has become a parking lot.  Sometimes when I'm at work, ideas swirl around and they need to go somewhere so I can focus.  A quick post here serves that purpose (and lets me delay doing work I'm not all that interested in).  It's not so much , but it does become a storage place for ideas I need to set aside.

I haven't been posting much lately for a few reasons.

• I'm mentoring "the new guy".  Either I'm looking at his screen or he's looking at mine.
• That takes up a lot of time and I still have my own work to do, no time to procrastinate.
• I'm interested in what I'm doing at work again so my attention span is better. 
• I don't have negative thought swirling around that need temporary storage.
• I spend all day in front of a computer, so when I'm home, I don't spend much time online.  If I don't find time to post at work, I'm not likely to post at home.
• I don't have a lot to think about, I'm at an action stage more than a thinking stage.

This weekend was great.  We are getting the basement and hallways/stairs to the second floor painted on Wed/Thurs which means we have to declutter to let the painters get at the walls.  The basement is where we hang out, it's full of media and stuff.  We filled 14 52L totes with books, DVD's and CDs and 5 paper boxes of books.  And that's still not everything.  What can I say?  Mr. Lina likes his movies and we support a lot of musicians by purchasing CDs.

In May we (that's the royal we, meaning mostly Mr. Lina) sanded the deck and stained it, the focus being on the horizontal boards of the deck so we could set out our new patio furniture.  Sunday we finally had the weather and time to finish the railings.  We weren't sanding those down, just painting over them.  It was hot and sweaty work but it looks nice now that it is done.  Another box ticked off on the to-do list.

Mr. Lina started a batch of beer with a friend on Monday (a stat holiday in Ontario).  They are splitting the batch of a Belgian Tripel they are trying to clone (smile, nod, no it doesn't mean much to me either but if you want to know more, check this out).  So I had to clean the kitchen so they could make a mess of it with the beer making (which they did generally clean up).

And I sewed.  Yes indeed, I've made another Sorbetto.  This is now the 4th time I've made this pattern but I need that kind of low thinking/pre-traced sewing to get me back into the swing of things and this does fill a wardrobe gap.  There was still some thinking involved since the first two don't really fit well at the bust (not sure if they ever did or if it's a change in bras), even after #3 it still needed some tweaking.  I asked Mr. Lina to take pictures of me on Friday when I wore #3 to work, but it didn't quite happen.  #4 needs to be hemmed and we'll see how #3 did in the wash last night.  It's 100% cotton and came out wrinkly (as expected from cotton), hopefully it did all of it's shrinking in the pre-wash.

So moving two 64L bins of fabric our of my sewing room seems to have had a positive impact - productivity.  Saturday I'll be joining the Toronto Meet Up (details here - and I have a choice of new shirts to wear!), which means shopping, the opposite of decluttering.  I might have to keep an eye out for some white fabric.  We're doing a team fun day of lawn bowling on Monday afternoon, wearing white is required.  I suspect my pale beige pencil skirt that probably doesn't fit me at my present weight is a good choice for lawn bowling.  A white A line skirt might be in order and I'm sure the only white in my stash is broadcloth.

Check In

I have started posting a couple of times and I'm still struggling to find the right words.  I have so many trees that I'm struggling to see the forest.  Just so this isn't totally pictureless, I'm going to add a few vacation pictures from our time in Manitoba.  I came back to "bad things" and didn't really get to talk about our vacation.  It was very restful but I look tired in every picture.

In general, I'm doing quite well.  I've been able to focus at work most of the time.  I'm not a teary mess prone to negative thoughts, nor a complete space cadet (although I did leave my purse at home on Thursday).  I can see a little anger poking through now and again through sarcasm or self depreciating humour, but it's little peeks, not full blown craziness. 

Does this look like someone who slept 10 hours?

Physically, things are also good.  I pretty much fit back into my old bras.  The bruises on my abdomen are pale brown, if they were elsewhere you might think I missed a spot with sunscreen and have a strange tan line.  I somehow lost a little weight.  That has helped with my body acceptance.  I don't feel fat on top of not speaking to my uterus and I fit into another pair of pants.  I'm about 10lbs down from my high weight and looking at my book of measurements, my waist is the same size as it was in 2007 (granted it was an inch smaller in 2010, I still have a little ways to go).  I don't really have the resources to focus on weight loss, I'd just like to continue making wiser choices and keep an eye on my portion sizes.  I'm not in a rush and this seems to be working.

I am struggling to do some things I would have avoided while pregnant.  I guess to do some of these things I really have to be okay that it's done.  Really done-done.  This is where I see a little disconnect.  I'm not sad, I can talk about what happened and adoption, and yet I can't seem to accept a diet Coke or a glass of wine.  I am easing into these things and trying not to make a big deal of it either way (neither beating myself up for not being ready nor forcing myself to do it).  I'll get there.  I've had a few sips of Mr. Lina's beer and is it really such a bad thing to not have artificial sweetners?  Weight loss sure is easier if I'm not drinking a bottle of wine.

Mr. Lina is doing a little better too.  Not that we've talked much about the loss specifically, but we both seem to feel like we've said as much as we can on the previous losses and we are able to talk about what's next.  He is starting to say things that he will miss because we won't experience a new born baby.  It's a start.  When I went to see our therapist I went on my own.  I was worried at first she would think things weren't good with us, she's often commented on the strength of our relationship.  But she agreed with me, if he wasn't ready to talk to her, that's okay and it was okay for me to come on my own.  I'm pretty sure he's coming with me on Thursday for the second appointment.

Moving onto adoption is a big domino to over turn.  We had already said we would need to move, so naturally that's next on the to-do list.  (Side note, it's not Children's Aid Society/Family & Child Services (CAS/FACS depending on the region) that would require us to move, but this isn't our "with-kids-forever-house" and it's not fair to adopt siblings and realize 3 days in that there isn't enough space and putting them through more upheaval.  I'm not giving up my sewing room.)  I'm not sure how ready I am for that.  It's making me more likely to pitch things while cleaning up, but it's moving that makes me feel overwhelmed when I really think about it.  I'm not sure where we should go to, which employers we should focus on when picking a location, it's a lot to juggle and I don't like ruling out options.  Not to mention 9 years of crap in the house that needs to be dealt with.  I've packed up two clear 62L bins of fabric.  It sounds like a lot but it still leaves lots of fabric to work with should the muse strike.  I could probably fill two more and still have fabric out for a dozen projects.  Cleaning up my sewing room like this also made me realize just how many UFO's I have.  UFOs are something to contemplate another day.

In the meantime, I've ended up crocheting a lot.  Granted it's all the same blanket pattern that I made for my niece, but I find it soothing and it makes television time with Mr. Lina feel less... wasteful.  One project is in a white yarn that I'm not overly happy with.  It felt softer on the ball than in the project and it's made up BIG.  This is not going to be a baby sized blanket.  I need to buy another crappy ball of yarn because it's not long enough for the width and it's not so crappy that it isn't worth finishing.  So it's on hold for the moment.  While in Manitoba, I started a yellow blanket I'm happier with.  It's soft and the shells are smaller and popping to opposite sides nicely.  As much as I bought 3 balls of wool, I think I'll need a 4th, it's not getting a lot of height in the shells.  I put 27 shells across instead of 29 that the pattern calls for, but it is still going to need more rows to look balanced to the width.

And just a reminder that there will be a Toronto meet up on August 10th at 10am.  I am really looking forward to it.  FunnyGrrl is coming to town and the details are on her blog, Falling Through Your Clothes.  It looks like we're up to 9-10 people so far.

Weekend Review - Creativ Festival

Kay at Gently Down the Seam (side note, I think this is my favourite sewing pun for a blog) sent out a little note to people who participated in the Toronto meet up that she was going to both days of the Creativ Festival, was anyone else going?  I didn't even know about it but it seemed my Saturday was free and I welcomed the opportunity to strengthen some online ties in person. Kay, Adrienne, and Debbie have already posted about it.

Picture from Debbie, myself, Kay, Debbie and Adrienne.

I have to say that without Kay pointing it out, I wouldn't have thought twice about it.  So often the focus is on crafts I find interesting but not me.  Like quilting, scrap booking or beading.  I was pleasantly surprised by the titles of the workshops, there did seem to be garment sewing content.

The  web site was a little challenging to find what I wanted.  At one point I thought I was on their web site but it was really the blog.  I read something about advanced group tickets and the cut off for that was Monday and this was Thursday, I assumed that was the same for advanced tickets.  I was busy at work and not looking too carefully, I thought I would just buy my ticket at the door.

One session I was really keen on was at 9:30 - Make Bra.  Sounds right up my alley.  Imagine the frustration when Debbie and I got there at 9:15 (she with e-ticket in hand) that the door sales didn't start until 9:30 and I couldn't get in until 10.  Their reasoning was that it was incentive to buy in advance.  I get that, there was a draw for $900 to spend at the festival open to Debbie and not me, that's a good incentive.  Letting people in to shop the booths early, also incentive.  But starting seminars before it opens for everyone?  It felt like punishment to me, not incentive to them.

Debbie is interested in tatting and I've always been a little curious about how it's done so we went to a free intro-to-tatting lesson.  Half an hour is not enough time to learn much of anything but I got the concept of what was involved so I'll appreciate the work that went into tatting I see in the future.

The main stage had two sessions that were a blur of clothing and sales pitches (and lunch for us).  Some of it was kind of interesting, but I found them a bit of a whirlwind.  The focus seemed to be:

1. It's okay to eat cookies, just sew with elastic (that session was titled .Comfortable Clothes that Camouflage, but I could have used more camouflage and less "insert elastic here!")
2. Sewing is easy, cut a circle in a square and you have a skirt.
3. When in doubt, add embellishment (jewels, metallic, etc) but not the sleeves, you don't want to overdo it.

Now as my weight has changed, I appreciate knits and elastics, but some of it seemed beyond slapdash and into magic wand territory.  I am not a couture sewer at all, I'm just not in that stage of my sewing career.  Let's focus on me getting one thing done rather than soaking 30 hours of sewing into a winter coat.  But even I found this a little much.  You would think that if you went to the festival and you chose to join that session,  you have some knowledge of sewing already.  So why focus so much on making sewing look like magic because it's so easy?  And from a fashion perspective, well, it wasn't overly inspiring either.  I'm not interested in bejewelling my clothing and when I did see something I liked (lightly padding a lapel on a jacket that was puckering at the seams) it was so fast I didn't really have a chance to absorb what she did to make it work. 

Interesting though, I have found myself thinking about these two sessions a lot and what it means in the wider sewing world, so maybe my review is sounding harsher than it should.  This was like the opposite of Myrna Giesbrecht who will muslin many time to get what she wants and savours the process of getting there.  Or K-Line with her many muslined Spring Suit project.  But, there were times when I thought Myrna would like some of the embellishments (maybe not the Cirque du Soleil foiling).  I seem to remember a comment about using threads to add detail, something I know she would like.

As others have noted, the fitting session with Lorraine Henry was really awesome.  Half an hour was not nearly enough time.  I had traced out the Alma blouse prior to the show and done a FBA but still feeling a little insecure with it.  After sewing a few tents and potato sacks lately, I'm feeling hesitant.  It was great to see her discussing a FBA specifically, it really made me feel more confident that I'd put the extra space in the right spot. 

And while the session on sewing machine & serger maintenance with Joanne Brousseau sounds pretty dry, I spent a good 45 minutes cleaning my machine on Sunday.  Clearly it was inspiring.  Looking at the machine closely, I noticed the arm is a little pink.  I think the red ponte for Tiramisu has rubbed off.  I'll have to be careful when I wash it, maybe put one of the dye catchers in the wash.

If I had gone on my own, I'm not sure I would have enjoyed it.  I would have sat through a few sessions (probably skipped the machine maintenance), felt overwhelmed by the people and the frequent sales pitches (I was starting to expect the as seen on TV kind of lines of "but wait, there's more!" or "with three easy payments of...") and left.  But with the ladies, I was open to any of the sessions, it was lovely to talk (and laugh) and break up the knowledge soaking that went on.  My brain felt full when I got home.

Both pre-washed, striped shirting on the right has been cut.

Sunday I ended up with a bit of a hang over (oops) and Mr. Lina had people over to record voice work so I had to be quiet, the microphone will pick up the sewing machine and foot steps two floors up.  But I felt the itch and interest returning through my headache.  As well as the machine cleaning session, I pre-washed fabric above, ironed 3m of one of the shirtings, cut out the Alma and started sewing the darts/stay stitching.  This morning I popped into my sewing room to get something and noticed one point from the V cut in (I'm doing View A) was curling a little and I started ironing and adding a little strip of interfacing to the seam allowance.  I never sew in the morning.  Never.

I take this as a very good sign.

Shopaholic

There is an expression of those who can't do, teach.  Well, I think those who can't sew, shop.

I have been very aware that my output has been reduced to damn near nothing the past few months.  This makes shopping a little risky.  I don't need more stash because I'm not using what I have, but it can be inspiring to have new fabric.  And I still sew things in my mind.  Sadly, I think some of it leads to what I'd call "analysis paralysis" at work.  Looking at so many things at the same time can bring you to a full stop from indecision rather than pushing you to do more. 

I thought that I was showing restraint.  I haven't been in a Fabricland for ages.  I limited myself to a couple of pieces of fabric when my parents were away, a few things at the sewing meet up...  But in taking pictures, this doesn't look like much restraint.

When my parents go to Florida, I can't resist buying a few things and having it shipped to them.  It's just so cheap.  Let's start with Fabric.com purchases, two shirting fabrics

 I was thinking about blouses for these shirts.  Since adding a little weight and buying a new bra (and accepting an additional cup size) my summer shirt wardrobe has shrunk.  Things that I could kind of get away with are not going to work this summer.  My employers dress code is casual but not so casual that I can wear tshirts.  Say, either of these in an Alma with jeans would be perfect for the three days I'm there.  Add dress pants and it might work with my clients office.


Then I ordered more bra making supplies from www.sewsassy.com. I like their prices and with few exceptions the quality has been good. I stuck mostly to findings and elastics.





Two types of underwires and nylon coated metal slides.

 

Wide lace elastic & bra elastics, close up below.

 

Strap elastic at the top, then band elastic and channeling at the bottom.

So let's talk underwire for a minute.  In deciding that I need to go up a cup size (well, two but down a band size so in sister sizes I mean one) I need new underwires if I want to make bras.  Here are a close up of 3 underwires. 

To the left is a demi wire I bought a couple of years ago (also from Sew Sassy but I have no idea why I bought it).  The white wire is "flex lite" spring steel underwire and the third is wholesaler overstock underwire on the site, sold in packages of 6 pairs.  I wish I still had a crappy pair of underwire that they sell at Fabricland.  I think I have twist ties that are stronger than they are.  They may be fine for a young woman with a small cup size, or maybe a bathing suit, but I as K-Line has pointed out, weak wires can be the downfall of a full support bra.  On the Sew Sassy site, they picture the flex lite inside the flat metal wires because the shape/height is a little different.  Compared to the flex lite, the flat metal are 3/8" larger inside width but 1/2" smaller inside depth and 1/8" inch smaller in outside length.  Looking at the list of underwire sizes you start to understand how not all cup sizes are quite equal.  I really like the weight of those flat metal wires. 

Two bras that I thought fit well both died because of plastic component failure.  It's a sad reason to not have a functional bra.  I bought white nylon coated metal (which can be dyed although the odds of me doing that are slim) slides from Sew Sassy.  On the Toronto meet up, I found some awesome metal findings (front clasp in the top left corner is plastic but it seems a bit thicker than what I have).  Silver isn't as easy to find as you'd think and I like silver accessories.

 

I did buy two pieces of fabric.  I have a soft spot for wide lace elastic.  This is actually a pale purple colour, the green background is changing the colour a bit.  I spied it behind the cutting table, I tell you wide lace calls to me if it's over 5" wide.

 

 

And then craziness took over.  I've made a few bathing suits.  I think they represent a good ROI on my sewing time compared to full retail prices assuming you can get the material on sale.  I was given a little discount on this but it is probably the most expensive fabric I've ever purchased (on the plus side, you don't need much for a bathing suit).

It's wild.  I don't even like orange but the purple (kind of maroon-ish) and black swirls danced before my eyes blinding me.  I think my brain was already in Mexico.  The feel of this fabric is really nice.  It's going to take a little time to cut into this because it may end up being one of those precious fabrics you can't stop touching long enough to cut into.

Given that I have (clearly) a crap ton of recent purchases.  I tried to show restraint during the swap.  I picked up a piece of stretchy leather looking fabric.  Really stretchy, like legging stretchy.  I'm pretty sure that Kristiann at Victory Patterns offered this up, she was quite funny in "selling" it to the group.  Black photographs so well (did you hear that sarcasm?) I didn't even bother trying to get the black and shiny features but that's it behind the pattern.  I have never purchased a Hot Pattern before so I was happy to take this one home.  Thanks K-Line!

And last but not least...  While in Landshut, Germany, we happened to walk past a fabric store.  At the time we were starving and looking for a restaurant that served something other than strudel & coffee or take out.  But the next day, we went back.  I bought 2m of this for myself...

The fabric is folded back at the spool of thread so you can see the wrong side and get a little sense of the drape.  It's kind of cool, like satin but not nearly as shiny (see how light isn't reflecting on any of the folds like the black stretchy stuff).  Very soft and a rather substantial weight to it.  I love the shades of purple and beige seems like it adds some versatility to it.  There is a little one directional stretch to it. 

And that is the end of the shopping confessional. 

So Much to Share

and so little time...

I need to take more pictures to do a proper post but I'll sum it up in a few bullet points for now.

• The Toronto meet up was awesome - need to take pictures of my purchases prior to going into more details on that.
• A week in Mexico was just what I needed.

• Weather was good, resort was fantastic, friends were great (picture above courtesy of friends who were more organized than us and already put pictures up on Facebook).
• I really should make a dress similar to that one, Mr. Lina is a fan and I feel quite sexy in it.
• I don't understand why no one is bringing me margaritas on the rocks, I have my pesos ready for tipping but they don't show up at my desk.
• My hair goes wavy in Mexico, I miss those curls, it's so much easier to pull my hair up and look pretty, now it just looks boring.
• My manager quit while I was away, next Thursday is his last day.
• I will miss him but I understand his choice to move on.
• You know I don't think I'm good for managers.  Not one of the 6 managers I've had over 7 years still work for my employer.
• I've come back to more things being put on my plate, not so much work for me to do, but as the person who needs to know what's going on when he's gone.
• And it's all up in the air as to what's going to be done to fill his role, it won't be me directly (way too much of a sales role for my personality), but it might shift what the department needs from me.
• And did I mention that I have had to make my own breakfast?  There is no buffet of food waiting for me in the kitchen. 
• Life after all inclusive resorts is hard.  ;)

Now to switch gears and prep for a house concert Sunday afternoon (GTA bloggers let me know if you're interested) and then packing for Germany!

We get amazing artists through Home Routes.  One of our previous concerts, Annabelle Chvostek, is nominated for a Juno (the Canadian version of the Grammies) for her album Rise.  So very cool.  But, this week it's The Sweet Lowdown from Victoria BC. 

Count me in

Things are improving somewhat since Monday.  Deciding that it wasn't just a headache that all the signs of being fuzzy headed and feeling sensitive to noise probably indicated a migraine.  Somehow this made me feel okay about feeling crappy.  So I took Wednesday off work and while I'm still feeling a little stressed, and yesterday I was still a little fuzzy around the edges, it's not as bad as it was.

Clothing for my vacation is packed. 

Work is still crazy but will be ending for a week by the end of the day.

I have ticked off enough on my to-do list to feel somewhat better.

I have actually opened (most) of my email.

Did I mention I'm packed?

So what should I do on Saturday...  No need to pack, can't be bothered to clean up the house.  Haven't bought groceries so there isn't much in the fridge to toss out.

I think I will go shopping.

Let's see, non-work people, walking outside, retail therapy, and the opportunity to take some fabric for trade.  What a great start to a vacation.

The meet up is finishing near The Cameron House, where Corin Raymond is playing from 6-8.  We've hosted Corin both for his solo work and as the Undesirables, I've written about him a couple  of times.  Corin is paying for part of the production of the album Paper Nickles with Canadian Tire money and I have another $1.15 to drop off.  He's only $500 from his goal, it's absolutely crazy how much he has amassed.  I don't know that I'll stay right to 8 (my flight is at 6:15am, I think I'm going to have to get up at 3am) but it's pay what you can and worth what you can afford.