Friday, March 30

Mochaccino Ramblings

I mentioned that my Thurs/Fri client got new coffee machines and oh boy I think I'm getting addicted to the mochaccinos.  They are lovely.  Caffeine is not always good to my punctuation and thought process, so we'll see where today's list goes.

  • Mr. Lina has been sick this week.  He took Wednesday off work, worked a little from home on Thursday and has generally been hopped up on Neocitron and wanted to snuggle.  I've watched a lot of tv this week instead of sewing, but it is hard to argue with snuggles.
  • I thought I was doing well until I started to cough last night.  I may be skipping the initial feeling stuffy part and going right to the cough.
  • Which doubly sucks as we have very close friends visiting tomorrow night from the UK, with their two kids in tow.  I don't want to make them sick at the start of their visit. 
  • I did switch to my better vitamins on Saturday, 2 pills twice a day.  I dunno if they are truly that much better, but I don't seem to have flourescent pee from the excess vitamins my body can't process all at once.
  • Went to the clinic yesterday to review the plan, price and paperwork.  Switching from IVIG to intralipids streamlines the process, apparently I won't be taking Fragmin (blood thinner, daily injection) but they do want me taking vitamin E daily and there will be a week of being on an antibiotic.
  • Intralipids take about 3 hours, they do it in the clinic in an examination room.  I am to bring a pillow, a blanket and something to do.  Apparently most people sleep.  I don't have to bring a driver (although Mr. Lina is still welcome to come) because they don't expect side effects and a nurse will check on me every half hour.  We'll do it once prior to Day 9 of the FET cycle, again with a second positive pregnancy test, and a third time if there is a heartbeat for the six week ultrasound.
  • Ah, and the bill...  I guess I'm just too far down the infertility road for suprises, the nurse was teasing us we were so quick to agree and sign papers.  Intralipids will cost us $700 per treatment (far cheaper than IVIG but because that was done in the hospital it was covered by the government) and I'm okay with that.  I can't say I like it, but I'm the one that wants to do this, I would rather see my tax dollars pay for my mom's eye drops so she can see.  FET fees went up from $1200 to $1400, I got the feeling the nurse was expecting us to react to that.  It's not an unreasonable percentage over two years and they typically discount the second FET off of the same IVF by 50%.  I get a lot of personal care from nurses and it's still cheap relative to the US. 
  • Odd that the car cost less than the clinic bill but seems to hurt more.  I put $900 into it in January, $1500 yesterday.  Ouch.  Next oil change better just be an oil change.
  • So... no dressform for Sera. 
  • For now.  And I'm okay with that.
  • We are watching How I Met Your Mother on NetFlicks.  It's been great to watch good comedy.  And now we're at the point (season 6 I think) where Lily and Marshall are interested in babies so three episodes have resulted in one of the two of us crying (we seem to have different triggers). 
  • How I Met your Mother also inspired Mr. Lina to send me pictures of tea cup pigs instead of lambs.
  • From
  • I don't know if we just power through this story arc or shelve it for a while.  Sometimes it's good to release a little pressure off of the emotional dam. 
  • Today is day 31 of this cycle, we're heading into some potential PMS time if my period sticks to it's 35-43 day "routine". 
  • Okay, this is going to sound lame, but... we go camping Victoria Day, May 21st with a big group of friends.  If this cycle ends April 1, the next cycle will end fairly predictably at 28-30 days because I'll be taking Provera/Lupron, so say it ends April 30th.  The embryos are specifically Day 5 blastocysts, so they need to be transferred 5 days after I ovulate, so Day 19-21 and that puts the transfer right in the middle of the long weekend.  Yay me.  Another year of camping being fucked up by infertility. 
  • Day 5 Blastocyst, not actually mine.
  • Do I hope that this cycle lasts closer to 40 days and the Provera-induced nightmare lasts an extra couple of days so the transfer is later that week?  I'll still have to drive into the clinic at least once, possibly every day, over that weekend, but we don't travel far to camp, it would be about an hour each way.
  • This is the petty and annoying part of infertility treatments, my life becomes nearly unplannable until the time arrives but two months out I know there might be complications.  I've missed camping a few times now because of infertility.  The first IVF cycle I figured I could manage it not realizing that I'd be on two injectable drugs starting that weekend that needed to be refrigerated but not frozen (frozen is more of a risk overnight than too warm in May).  It was insane and led to tears on my part and Mr. Lina completely stressed out worrying about the very expensive medication.  At least this time all the medications are pills.
  • Monday I had my performance review and while it went well, there was a clear dividing line of happy Sera prior to August and not so happy Sera after August.  I am harder on myself than they are on me, but in a way that paralyzes myself into feeling useless.  It was nice to hear they still want me. 
  • Positive feedback included that I am a good presenter.  I know that, at least, I feel that I am good giving presentations.  I enjoy doing it and I like teaching people, I am comfortable with questions on the fly.  It seems that because I am perceived as quiet, they think I will be shy and then are pleasantly surprised when they attend a presentation and I'm relaxed and engaging. 
  • This is a reoccuring theme in my life, people see me differently than I see myself.  Half of them know me as the bubbly, chatty person that feels natural, and the other half think I don't talk at all.  Seriously, the first time this happened was kindergarten.  Although, I was rather selective of who I talked to then so it wasn't entirely unfounded.
  • I misplaced my cell phone yesterday, I had it prior to walking into the mechanics, but not after the doctors.  I'm pretty sure it's in my car, I can't see it but my hands free bluetooth seems to be connecting to it so it has to be there somewhere, right?
So, that's essentially my week in review.  With friends visiting overnight, I don't think I'll get to sew this weekend.  Next project is a second take at the Consultative Dressmaker pants block.  I am eager to get at it so first opportunity I'll be there.


  1. Wow. I am always blown away when you write about your infertility issues. I never wanted kids, but I am sure that as a woman I have some consciousness of the emotional pain people experience when they have these issues. It breaks my heart, I am so hoping this all works for you this time around.

    One of the best products I have found for fighting colds etc is this:
    seriously this is an awesome product. When I feel I am coming down with a cold I will use this up to 6 times per day, it really helps. As it isn't really medication it wouldn't interfere with any of the meds you are taking. Superstore has it the cheapest.

    1. Aw.. it's just me. I need to write things things from time to time so I'm glad you like listening. Some way, some how, someone is going to call me Mom. I truly believe that.

      I am a fan of using neti pot during allergy season, I swear it kept me from my usual ragweed induced October sinus/chest infection. And as you say, you can do it as much as needed without any harm at all. Mine even happens to be that particular brand (although the pot, not the spray). I hadn't though about it because this is a cough, but I should have because it's all connected. Thanks for the reminder!

  2. I have spent my childbearing years (which most certainly better be behind me very soon) trying NOT to get pregnant. However, You are one of 3 who are right in the middle of it. I can only imagine the frustration. You do seem to have such a positive attitude throughout. I can only think that HAS to work in your favor at some point.

    As for the neti pot--I am also a fan. Don't know if you have heard about some problems with using tap water, though. I do not remember the details, but there were unwanted germs involved. So, the cheapest water you can find in a bottle is probably a good idea.

    The teacup pig is cute and creepy at the same time.

    Have a great week!

    1. A positive attitude has got me where I am now. No point in doing it if you can't feel positive.

      I use filtered water for my neti pot, you do have to be careful that it's truly clean water.

  3. I asked the Hubs to make sure, and the Bluetooth requires your phone to be within 30 feet. So yeah, most likely somewhere in the car (or in the garage?).

    Good luck with the infertility treatments! I hate when things mess up my schedule. I'm someone who loves routine and being unable to plan my camping trip would make me downright cranky. However, I use media as a distraction so watching a TV show about the stuff that was upsetting me...would not work for me. YMMV, of course.

    As an introvert who is a social butterfly among close friends, I feel your pain. I can't even count the number of times someone finally got up the courage to talk to me and admitted, "Oh, I thought you were stuck-up!" No, I'm just awkward, thanks!

    1. I found it, it was under the drivers seat. I ended up having my husband call me from his cell while we were both in the car.

      This illness has knocked me on my ass. I watched ah... 9 episodes of the British version of Being Human.

      "I'm just awkward, thanks" ah... yes, I know what you mean. It's strange to be seen so very differently than you intend and feel.

  4. My sister loves tea cup pigs and is on a mission to get one and call it... hmmm she has a hilarious name but now I can't remember it!

    Performance reviews are always interesting....

    1. Doesn't it always seem like the harder you try to recall a detail or name the harder it is to remember?


Thanks for your comments, I love to have a two way conversation. I seem to be getting a lot of spam from anonymous users and am turning off the ability to comment that way. I really would like to hear from you so if you do want to add your two cents without an OpenId, email me at seraphinalina at gmail dot com.