Tuesday, April 16

Ramble On

* Edited to add a picture of my poor toe.
I started a sewing post yesterday (yes, I have been productive in my vaguely "tidy" sewing room) but it is going to have to wait (it would be better with pictures anyhow).  My thoughts are rather jumbled so let's do a list, shall we?
  • I hurt (broke/cracked/jammed?) my right middle toe last night.  We were taking out the garbage I was looking up at the house rather than where my feet were going and I stepped on the curb of the driveway at a bad angle.  This pulled my foot in one way and my crappy ballet flat in the other and pinched my toes.  I really can't explain how it happened, all I know is my shoe was not on my foot by the time I looked down and some not nice words were coming out of my mouth.
  • On the plus side, I didn't hurt my ankle.
  • You don't realize how important toes are until they hurt.
Poor toe.  It wasn't this bruised when I left for work.

  • Weird things are going on with my hormones
    • My breasts are sore.
    • I think they are also getting bigger, looking at where the under wire lines are on my body at the end of the day, they aren't far enough back.
    • I started crying on the drive home last night.
    • I cried on my drive to work.
    • Granted, both happened while I was listening to the news about the bombing in Boston so it's not without reason, but I'm not sure that's the only reason.
  • I am not unhappy.
  • But... what if this is where it starts?  I don't want to ignore signs like what feel like disproportionate tears.
  • Remember how my manager quit?  I told my new manager about my fertility issues yesterday.
  • Rather than replacing my former manager directly with someone senior, they are using that salary to hire two junior positions. It's a good call in my book, we need more people to do the work that is being sold.
  • Someone else on our team quit, her last day is Tuesday.
  • This requires shuffling people to meet her client facing responsibilities.  Her client days (and mine) are paid for by that client, we can't have a gap.
  • I was offered being on site one day a week with a client as part of the shuffling.  I turned it down.
  • It's probably the first time I've made a decision on what I (didn't) want to do at work.
  • Why not?  We're hiring three new people in the next few months (I gather two are pretty much decided on) and they will need support.  If training others is what I enjoy doing, I'd rather have the time to do it. 
  • Besides, I kind of admitted to myself (and my new manager), I'm a bit bored with my client facing role.  Two days a week is enough.
  • In order to build up the skills of our two most junior on sites, they will now be sending their work through me before sending it to the client.  I like this, a chance to work with them to build their skill set and bring another perspective to a project. 
  • Honestly, both of them come to me with questions anyhow, it's just being formalized that I'll see the finished work too.  They won't feel like they are pestering me and I will get recognition for helping them.  Win-win.
So lots of stuff going on right now.  Honest, sewing post is coming soon.  It involves draping purple broad cloth of all things.


  1. Sera, I've been in those shoes, but much much smaller size than yours. I wrote down more stuff, but didn't want to put more personal stuff about me on the internet for the world to see, so deleted them... But just want to say hang in there.... If you'd like to see a naturopath, I highly recommend mine. She lives in Vaughan and doesn't work on weekends... but she's FANTASTIC.

    Proud of you for standing up and putting your foot down and telling them you didn't want to do what you didn't want to do.

    And Sorry to hear about your foot... Hope it heals faster.

    Can't wait to see what you are up to, in the sewing room. Draping, eh!

    1. I went to a natropath for a little shy of 2 years. I liked her a lot and I took much better care of myself, but it honestly felt like a lot of time and money when things still went wrong with two pregnancies. After the second pregnancy, I intended to just take a short break and go back and I never did.

      You know it's not even standing up to anyone at work about what I want, I haven't been good at articulating what I do want. I've just gone with the flow and what worked for our department. It wasn't easy to figure out what I wanted but I feel good about it so it must have been the right choice.

  2. It's awesome that you not only told your bosses what you wanted, but also that they apparently listened! :-)

    Hope your foot gets to feeling better soon!

    P.S. That's my fave Led Zepplin song. ;-)

    1. I truly appreciated it being a request rather than demand.

      I just took off my sock. I feel less wimpy for shedding a few tears last night.

      I'm not a huge Led Zepplin fan, but that's my fave too.

  3. Oh, poor toe! I've broken that same one on a couple of occasions and it's painful. I hope you will feel much better soon.

    1. It sucks, but it will heal. This is way better than spraining my ankle.


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